“RABBI’S MUSINGS (&
AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh parshas Miketz
29 Kislev 5782/December 3, 2021
Shabbos Chanukah – Rosh Chodesh Teves
To be added to
my “Striving Higher” WhatsApp chat with periodic chizuk clips, or
my “Power Parenting” WhatsApp chat with weekly ideas about parenting,
text me at 845-641-5094.
לרפואה שלימה נטע יצחק בן רחל
DONUTS FOR
LIFE
Chanukah
presents us with a difficult dilemma. The custom of eating foods that contain a
lot of grease, to remind us of our victory over Greece, has a special place in
our Chanukah observance. While most of us really enjoy fried latkes and
assorted donuts, those aren’t exactly the healthiest of foods. But I am happy
to announce that I have found a way that you can have latkes/donuts and enjoy
them too, in a manner that doesn’t add any calories, and isn’t at all
unhealthy. In fact, the more donuts/latkes you enjoy on my program, the better.
What’s more, my program is free and doesn’t entail any obligation.
One
day, as Rabbi Shraga Feivel Mendlowitz was preparing to begin saying shiur, his
talmidim went to gather chairs. Rabbi Mendlowitz noticed one talmid who brought
a chair and sat down to await the shiur beginning. He told the talmid that it
was a wasted opportunity. If he had brought two chairs, one for someone else,
he could have had a chair for himself and performed a chesed for someone else.
But instead, he had only concerned himself with his own needs.
When a
new couple stands together under the chuppah, the universal custom is for the
chosson to step on and shatter a glass.
(As an
aside, following the chuppah, my father often carefully snatches the cloth
napkin with the broken shards in it. He then presents it to the chosson during
Sheva Berachos, as a reminder of the last time he was able to “put his foot
down”.)
The well-known
reason for doing so is so that at the moment of our greatest joy, we
demonstrate that our celebration is incomplete, as long as the Bais Hamikdash
has not yet been rebuilt.
The
Imrei Emes however, offered an additional symbolism of the smashing glass.
Before one is married, he is concerned with his own needs, metaphorically
filling his personal cup. Under the chuppah, right after he has married, the
chosson smashes the glass, symbolizing that he can no longer only worry about
his own desires and needs. From now on, he has to care for his wife and ensure
that he is tending to and “filling her cup” as well.
When
describing the intensity of the plague of darkness in Egypt, the Torah states,
“No man could see his brother, nor could anyone rise from his place.” (Shemos 10:23)
The Chiddushei
Harim notes that the greatest darkness is when one doesn’t don’t see/notice others.
When one goes about his life wrapped in his own bubble of needs and wants and
doesn’t stop to consider the situation, perspective or plight of others, that
is true darkness.
Conversely,
when one lives beyond himself, investing time and emotional energy to consider
others, that illuminates the world surrounding. The intense darkness of Egypt
was the result of the fact that “no man could see his brother”. They were too
busy caring only for themselves.
At the
beginning of parshas Miketz, Pharaoh had two dreams that disturbed him
terribly. His advisors tried to offer interpretations – including that he would
have seven daughters who would subsequently die – but Pharaoh categorically
rejected all of them. It was only when Yosef informed him that there would be
seven years of plenty followed by seven years of famine that Pharaoh accepted
his interpretation.
What
made Pharaoh so confident that Yosef’s interpretation was correct?
As a
monarch, Pharaoh understood that his dreams were not for him alone, but that they
effected his entire kingdom. A king doesn’t live for himself, but rather with
the weight and responsibility of his entire kingdom. The interpretations of the
Egyptian magicians and wise men suggested that his dreams portended personal
events regarding his own family.
Yosef
however, explained the national message and suggested what needed to be done
for the sake of his entire kingdom, and that resonated with Pharaoh.
We light
Chanukah candles in a location where it can best be seen by others. The “festival
of lights” isn’t just celebrating the light we generate for ourselves, but more
significantly, the light we spread to others. We light one candle at a time,
symbolizing our ability to add a little more light to the world through our
actions and words.
So, how
can you enjoy endless donuts and latkes without getting fatter? Give them away
to others!
Every
donut I eat makes me a bigger person, but not in the way I want. Every donut I
give away also makes me a bigger person, albeit in a manner I hope will remain
with me for a long time.
The good news is that even if at the time you’re reading
this, Chanukah has already concluded, you can still enjoy the light of Chanukah
and donuts and latkes.
As long
as we are thinking about others, and seeking to make their day a little
brighter, the Chanukah candles continue to burn within us, illuminating our
lives, and brightening the world.
Freilichen
Chanukah & Orot Sameiach
Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos
Chodesh Tov & Good Chodesh
R’ Dani and Chani Staum