“RABBI’S MUSINGS (& AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh parshas Behar-Bechukosai – Shabbas
Chazak!
Avos perek 5 – 36th day of Omer
21 Iyar 5783/May 12, 2023
HEARTFELT CONNECTION
It’s not easy to be menachem avel as we don’t like going
to “sad places”. At the same time, however, it is often an elevating
experience. I often leave a shiva house with inspiring ideas I heard related
about the niftar, some that I could adopt and implement in my own life.
Shlomo Hamelech expressed this sentiment when he wrote, “It is better to
go to a house of mourning than to a house of feasting…. And the living will
take it to heart” (Koheles 7:2).
I recently went to be menachem avel my old friend Rabbi
Aharon Yitzchak Klein, after the passing of his father, Rabbi Sruli Klein z”l.
(I should clarify that although the friendship is old neither I nor Rabbi Klein
are old…)
During that visit, Rabbi Klein related that a few months prior he had
gone to visit his ailing father in the hospital. The senior Rabbi Klein told
his son to take a pen and paper and write down certain instructions that he
wanted his only son to adhere to upon his passing.
One of the instructions was that in his bedroom at home there was a pile
of quarters. It had been his practice to give five quarters to tzedakah daily,
and he wanted his son to continue doing so throughout the first year after his
passing. The first quarter he gave was in memory of his late wife. The next
three quarters he gave were in memory of three other close relatives. The last
one was given in the merit that he procures a kosher lulav and esrog for the
upcoming Succos.
Rabbi Aharon Yitzchak noted that his father wasn’t particular to have the
most beautiful or expensive lulav and esrog. He didn’t need to because
throughout the year he gave tzedakah daily to merit properly performing the
mitzvah.
It was amazing to me that the mitzvah of shaking daled
minim for the one week of Succos was on Rabbi Klein’s mind throughout
the year. It was a reminder that a Jew ought not just perform mitzvos but he
should live them and internalize them.
A talmid in the Telshe Yeshiva in Cleveland recounted that at one point
he was considering leaving yeshiva to go out to work. One day while sitting in
the Bais Medrash at the end of the learning session, he saw the Rosh Yeshiva,
Rabbi Mordechai Gifter, close his Gemara and kiss it loudly. The talmid was so
moved by that kiss and display of intense love for his Gemara that he decided
to remain in yeshiva for longer.
When Rav Lazer Shach reached an advanced age and it was hard for him to
read small letters, he was offered a computer that would significantly enlarge
the letters. Rav Shach refused it stating, “Ich darf a Gemara vos m’ken
kushan – I want to use a Gemara that I can kiss.”
Rav Shach wasn’t saying that there was a halachic issue learning from an
electric device. But he personally felt doing so would detract from his ability
to express his love for Torah.
A friend related that when his grandfather was admitted to the hospital
towards the end of his life, his grandfather wasn’t very lucid. At one point a
nurse placed the band around his left hand to take his blood pressure. When his
grandfather felt something tightening around his left arm, he immediately
recited the beracha “lihaniach tefillin”, the beracha recited by a
person as he tightens his tefillin around his weaker arm.
On the day that our oldest son Shalom put on tefillin for the first time,
I went with him to visit my Bubby a”h. She was living then in an
assisted-living facility and much of the time she was confused. I told her that
Shalom had put on tefillin that morning for the first time and requested that
she give him a beracha. She placed both her hands on his head and promptly
recited the beracha l’haneach tefillin, Hashem’s Name and all.
Apparently when she heard me say the words tefillin and beracha, that’s what came
to mind, and she replied accordingly. I didn’t even think she knew that
beracha.
As often as we were able, my wife and I would take our children to visit
my Bubby. Towards the end of her life, my Bubby was increasingly less aware of
what was happening around her. Before we left at night, we told her that our
children wanted to say Shema with her. As soon as I began saying Shema Yisroel,
she continued the entire paragraph and ended off with Hamalach Hagoel.
She may not have known what she ate for dinner or what she did that day, but
she knew the tefillos of her youth perfectly.
Kabbolas HaTorah entails not only accepting to perform and observe Torah
and Mitzvos. It is also about infusing their timeless messages into our core
essence. As we recite each night during maariv, “For it is our life and the
length of our days, and in them we will engage day and night”.
There is no law that one must kiss a Gemara. But a kiss is an expression
of love and when someone truly loves something or someone, he desires to express
that love.
The Jewish People love their seforim, tefillin, saying Shema, and shaking
lulav and esrog on Succos. We relish the opportunities afforded to us to
perform His will. That love becomes part of our very being and is eternal. Such
endless love is the result of constantly preparing ourselves to grow in Torah
and to live Torah.
Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos,
R’
Dani and Chani Staum