“RABBI’S MUSINGS (& AMUSINGS)”
Erev Shabbos Kodesh parshas Beha’aloscha
20 Sivan 5783/June 9, 2023
LASTING IMPRESSION
It is no exaggeration to say that my summers and camp experiences have
had a tremendous impact on who I am. Some of my foremost Rabbeim I only know
from my summers camp. During a confusing time during late adolescence when I
was trying to find the right yeshiva for myself, my camp friendships were a
source of great encouragement for me. But above all, being a counselor taught
me a great deal about responsibility. Having to deal with the vagaries and
annoyances of a dozen kids helps give a teenager perspective and appreciation
for the challenges of parenthood.
My rebbe, Rabbi Berel Wein, quips that G-d pays back all children by
making them parents. As children grow up, they often feel they have all the
solutions for proper chinuch to not make the same mistakes their parents did
with their upbringing. Then when the children become parents, they start to
understand their parents more. Being a counselor gives the future parent a head
start on that experience.
When I was a division head in camp, I would often laugh to myself when a
frustrated counselor would vent to me about how his campers don’t listen to a
word he says. I wonder how often his parents say the same thing about him.
Beyond parenthood, however, success in life requires taking responsibility.
Great things are accomplished by those who can shoulder burdens and are able to
deal with adversity. That is the hallmark of leadership as well.
Being a counselor forces a teenager to become a leader in his own bunk
with campers that look to him for guidance and to create order.
Many great leaders in our community, including notable Roshei Yeshiva,
were legendary personalities in their respective summer camps decades ago. Some
were also known for uncanny acting abilities or other talents uniquely endemic
to camp.
I know that my life has been incredibly impacted and influenced by my
experiences in camp as a counselor.
Every parent who sends a child to camp wants the child to have a
fantastic counselor. Not only can a good counselor make a difference in how a
camper’s summer goes, but he can also potentially have a significant impact on
a camper for the rest of his life.
I have met individuals older than I am who related to me that my father
was their counselor in Camp MagenAv many years ago, and that he made a lasting
impression on them. One fellow told me that as a child he was inhibited and
shy. When my father was his counselor, my father helped draw him out of his
shell. The man, who is today a grandfather, told me that much of who he has become
is thanks to that life-altering summer when he was a camper in my father’s
bunk.
Not only did I have counselors who made a profound impression upon me, as
a counselor myself I developed wonderful friendships with my own campers, many
of whom I am still in touch with now, years later.
In recent years however, it seems to be becoming increasingly harder for
camps to find solid counselors. Many older teens are simply not interested in
becoming a counselor. There is an increasing trend for bochurim to go on
cross-country road trips for a few weeks during the summer break. The
prevailing feeling is why should I work so hard at a 24-7 job with whiny
campers, when I could “chill” during the summer with my “boyz” and enjoy my
earned vacation more?
In my opinion, this is a sad and costly mistake. The young men/women
themselves are losing out on an admittedly arduous, though highly enriching
experience that will help them prepare for marriage and parenthood. It will
also force them to be responsible and disciplined, traits that are vital for
all components of life, especially growth in Torah and middos.
In addition, our youth are losing out by not having more quality
counselors who are b’nei Torah and b’nei aliyah. A counselor can
often impact his campers in a way that parents and Rebbeim are unable to. A
camper may have an easier time relating to his counselor and strive to emulate
him.
There is no doubt that there are more relaxing ways someone can spend his
summer other than being a counselor. But no one said accomplishing great things
would be easy.
Shabbat Shalom & Good Shabbos,
R’
Dani and Chani Staum