‘Parsha Growth Spurts’[1]
Rabbi Dani Staum
Parshas Devorim/Tisha B’av 5773
“These are the words that Moshe spoke to all of Yisroel…”
Rashi explains that because Moshe’s words contained strong rebuke he only alluded to their iniquities but didn’t mention them explicitly.
Rav Moshe Sternuch shlita (Ta’am V’da’as) notes that it is illogical to assume that the reason Moshe wasn’t more forthright with his rebuke because he was afraid to embarrass them. He was speaking to the entire nation, so why would anyone be embarrassed? Rather, Moshe was demonstrating an important lesson about rebuke. When one must rebuke another, it is better for him to do so in a covert manner to protect the listener’s dignity. Whenever a person is directly challenged his immediate natural reaction is to deny that he has committed any wrongdoing and to defend his behavior. But when the rebuke is offered sensitively, in such a way that demonstrates how rectifying the behavior will be for his own benefit and persisting in these behaviors will only serve to hurt him, there is a far better chance that he will hearken to the message being conveyed to him.
Rav Sternbuch concludes that we would be wise to learn this lesson from Moshe Rabbeinu, for this is the optimal approach one should employ in drawing our brethren toward a life of Torah and mitzvos.
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“These forty years Hashem, your G-d, has been with you; you have not been lacking anything.” (Devorim 2:7)
Rav Yankel Galinsky shlita (“V’hegadeta”) asked if they weren’t lacking anything in the midbar, how did they perform the mitzvah of tzedakah?
He explained that the manna tasted like whatever someone wanted it to taste like. If someone wanted it to taste like a steak grilled to perfection, coated with sauce, with fried onions on top, his manna immediately had that taste.
However, there were some Jews who never experienced such delectable foods and only thought of plain bread when they ate. Those who were more ‘seasoned eaters’ would relate to those with simpler tastes that the manna could be that much more enjoyable if they thought about more seasoned and exquisite foods. That was the tzedakah they were able to perform.
Rav Galinsky continued that there are many Jews who perform mitzvos and observe the Torah, but have little enjoyment or satisfaction from doing so. They may perform the same actions as other Jews with little noticeable external discrepancy, but internally their observance is dry and tasteless.
If one is able to demonstrate to such a person the inner beauty and feeling of connection that could be experienced from meaningful Torah observance, he can transform that person’s life.
Just as with the manna, when the same external food could have vastly different taste and experience based on one’s thoughts and perception, so it is with Torah observance. Helping others experience the blissful enjoyment of inner spiritual experience is an invaluable chesed.
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“Father of Mercy… Build the walls of Yerushalayim” (Tehillim 51:20)
There are two words Chazal use to refer to a wall – ‘kir’ and ‘chomah’. The word Kir is similar to the word ‘kar’ which means cold, while the word ‘chomah’ is similar to the word ‘cham’ which means warm. How can the same concept be represented by two words that have completely diverse connotations?
There are two different types of walls that a person can construct. One can build a magnificent palatial home, but where visitors feel unwelcome when they enter. They are not allowed to touch anything and there is a feeling of aloofness that pervades the building. Then there are homes which, upon entering, seem to feel much more inviting. The walls of such a home seem to warmly beckon to all who enter to feel comfortable and welcome.
The question is what kinds of walls do we build? Are the walls of our homes, our communities, and our shuls ‘kiros’ where people feel distant and detached, or do we seek to build ‘chomos’ where outsiders feel loved and welcomed?
On Shabbos morning we beseech of Hashem to build the “chomos Yerushalayim” – the “warm walls of Yerushalayim” which beckon to Jews everywhere to return home and reconnect with their people and heritage. Similarly, on Tisha B’av afternoon in the tefillah of Nachem we refer to the pasuk in which Hashem states that He will be a “Chomas Aish – wall of fire” surrounding.
As we erect embracing walls of love around each other, may we merit “the consolation of Tzion and rebuilding of Yerushalayim.”
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Sources: Difference between Kir and Chomah – Heard from Rabbi Yechiel Weberman in name of Rabbi Ephraim Shapiro
[1] This series was originally written for and published in Hamodia.